Have you recently learned your partner is pregnant? We imagine you’re feeling scared, overwhelmed, in denial, and even angry. Although our name is Aim Women’s Center, we help men sort through an unexpected pregnancy too.

First things first

Are you asking yourself…

  • “Is she really pregnant?”
  • “Am I actually the father?”
  • “Why wasn’t she more careful?”
  • “What am I supposed to do now?”
  • “Am I ready to be a dad?”
  • “How will I support her?”

Every one of these questions is valid and you deserve some answers. At Aim Women’s Center, we can provide some answers with our no-cost services.

Here’s where to begin:

  1. Confirm the pregnancy with a no-cost confidential pregnancy test
  2. Verify the test results with a no-cost confidential ultrasound
  3. Determine whether she’s had a miscarriage or has a healthy pregnancy
  4. Find out her due date

Next steps

After you’ve verified the pregnancy is viable, it’s time to discuss your options. It’s important to support one another while you’re making a decision. This is a difficult time for both of you. Being pregnant, her moods will swing while her hormones change. If you remain steady, it will help calm her. 

Ask her what you can do for her. Offer to go with her to all of her appointments. Even though you may no longer be together as a couple or you do not see a future together, you are both equal parts of the equation. Your voice matters.

Your options

The two of you need to decide whether the solution to her unexpected pregnancy is abortion, adoption, or parenting. It’s vital you are both in agreement about your choice.

Abortion

Although abortion may seem like an “easy” out, it has many physical and emotional side effects. At Aim, we’ll be happy to sit down with the two of you to discuss abortion procedures, side effects, and possible risks.

If you’re against abortion, speak up. Many women have said if they had known their partner was against it, they never would have had one.

Adoption

Choosing to make an adoption plan is hard, but also courageous. It means you and your partner are putting the needs of your child above your own. We have trusted adoption agency referrals to share with both of you.

Parenting

We’re sure being a parent right now is the last thing on your mind but it is entirely possible. Being a good father doesn’t require you to marry your child’s mother. Many men are actively involved with their children outside the home. If you both choose to parent or co-parent, there are many resources available for you.

One final thought

Men tend to think because she’s the one pregnant they don’t have a say, but she needs to know how you feel. We’re on your side.